Do not expect from anyone - including yourself

Dear Sachdeva ji,

   On 27th May, you wrote that one should not expect anything from anyone including ourselves. 

Not expecting from others is okay but from one's self? 

Is that not akin to giving up on ourselves, or, losing a bit of our enthusiasm?

                                    (From Anonymous)

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First of all. I would like to thank you for your comments. 

You have a very valid point.

However, what I wrote was: 

Stay happy and content - by not expecting too much from anyone - including yourself.

"Not expecting too much"

The problems spring when we start expecting too much or start expecting what might be beyond our reach.

Perhaps I should have clarified it a little more in that blog.

Secondly - this is what my understanding of the precepts, guidance & directions, or edifications written in the holy scriptures is.

I believe, that instead of taking the exact literal meaning of the words, we should try to understand them in a practical way. 

When Bhagavad Geeta, Upanishads, and other holy scriptures talk about 'No desires and no expectations - it is usually understood and interpreted to mean absolutely no desires or expectations. 

In my opinion, ' No-expectations' should not be taken as literally 'No-expectations at all'. 

Of course, we expect salary and wages from the employers for the work we do. 

We expect to reach the destination when we leave our place or start a journey. 

We expect to get a good job after getting a degree in a certain field, and so on.

That is not what the Scriptures are directing us to give up.

We usually generate and inculcate many other additional - casual and unnecessary expectations which cause unnecessary hurt and disappointment. 

Such as we expect people to act and behave in certain ways.

We expect our families and others to listen to us and obey every word. 

We expect our friends, associates, and acquaintances to do us certain favors, or return our favors in some way. 

Everyone expects to be recognized - acknowledged, admired, and respected. 

We all have these and many more similar kinds of expectations from people around us as well as from ourselves. When such expectations are not met, we feel wounded and hurt. 

Therefore, do everything with a good heart and expect nothing in return (for your good deeds and intentions) and you will never be disappointed. 

And that should be applied to ourselves as well. 

We should sincerely do all we can - put all our sincere and genuine efforts to the best of our ability to achieve our goals. But expecting too much from ourselves can also be disappointing and cause hurt and pain if our expectations are not met exactly as we wanted. 

We all have our limitations - and we should be aware of them and remember them before setting too high expectations that might be beyond our reach. 

The wisdom lies in knowing what we should or should not expect from ourselves. 

Because if we don't, and set too high expectations for ourselves then we might get hurt.

                                ' Rajan Sachdeva '