Parents and Children - Khalil Gibran

                   Khalil Gibran On Children

"Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you.
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.

You may house their bodies but not their souls 
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow -
Which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them - 
But seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor remains with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth".
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
So He loves also the bow that is stable.
                          "Khalil Gibran"
                            ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~

How simply and beautifully expressed, 
But so difficult to cultivate that detached attitude!

All parents love their children - and all children also love their parents. 
The clash usually occurs when one side starts demanding more than the other is doing.
Most parents think that their children are supposed to constantly obey them - to drop everything they are doing at their slightest signal and take care of them. For whatever reason, no matter how much they love and respect their parents - children may not be able to do so all the time. Unfortunately, many parents and elders translate it as noncompliance, disobedience and disrespect towards them. Usually, the parents (especially mothers) who come from Asian and specifically Indian and Pakistani backgrounds, are more prone to this kind of attitude than the westerners. 
They love to constantly remind their children how much they have sacrificed for them – in bringing them to this world and raising them up. Quite naturally, anyone would get irritated listening to such remarks all the time – hence – Clash.
While I was reading a book early this morning, I heard a beautiful Hindi song in the background:              
               *“Ye na sochain milaa kya hai humko
                Hum ye sochain kiya kya hai Arpan”
(Don't think what we have received or what we have gained,
Think what have we done, and what more can we do for others)
Wouldn't it be nice if everyone thinks like this?
Most differences and clashes will disappear if the both sides 
– parents and the children start thinking like this.
There is a famous saying in Hindi:            
         **  "Kshmaa badan ko chahiye – chhotan ko utpaat”
(The elders should always be willing to forgive when youngsters make mistakes)
Perhaps, as Khalil Gibran advised in the above axiom – more responsibility falls on the shoulders of parents.  If the parents show that they are happy and grateful for what their children are doing – and when the children feel that all their efforts, big or small - are appreciated – they will inevitably feel like doing more for the parents.
                           ‘Rajan Sachdeva’

 * "ये न सोचें मिला क्या है हमको 
                 हम ये सोचें किया क्या है अर्पण "

 ** "क्षमा बड़न को चाहिए  - छोटन को उत्पात "